icare's Lifetime Care and Support Scheme recipient Jess Stocker reflects in the lead up to Mother's Day

When Jess Stocker was 17-years-old, she survived a serious car accident in Uralla - but only just.

One of four teenagers in the car, Jess was seated behind the driver as the group drove from a party to a service station to get food.

"We got T-boned by a semi-trailer full of onions," Jess said.

"One of the other girls was awake the whole time, the others were unconscious, and my heart stopped five times. I had nine broken bones, a punctured lung, and a severe traumatic brain injury."

Read also:

The others went home that night, but Jess was taken to Armidale Hospital, then to Tamworth Hospital, where she was put into a coma and treated for post-traumatic amnesia.

"They also put a rod in my leg, and I stayed there for a month," she said.

"Then I was flown to North Shore Private Hospital in Sydney where I stayed for three months and saw a speech therapist, an occupational therapist, a neuropsychologist, and went to the gym five times a week."

Jess became one of the first entrants to icare's Lifetime Care and Support Scheme after the accident in late 2007.

An only child, she was raised by a single parent and says she is appreciative of the lifetime support from the insurer and her family but wishes her friends had also been supported somehow.

"My parents broke up pretty much when I was born, so I was never with my father, just my mother, and grandmas who are wonderful," she said.

"My good friend saw me dead - that was hard for her - we don't catch up anymore because I think it's too hard for her to see me.

"None of the others really got support for the mental impact, which I thought they should have."

The accident occurred a week before Jess was going to sit her Higher School Certificate - instead, she went back to learning how to walk and talk.

"When I came out of the coma, I couldn't eat or speak or walk or do anything and had to learn how to do that all again," she said.

"I was in a wheelchair and had to have needles every day. That was a bit hard, but that's how it happens. It was sad - but I couldn't cry properly because the tears wouldn't come, and I also lost my sense of taste as well.

"That was annoying, but it came back, which is good."

It took Jess three months in Sydney to re-learn the basics, and she is still improving every day; and she did go back to school but not like everyone else.

"It was one on one with a teacher just to relearn numeracy and literacy, and I didn't get to see my friends at lunchtime," she said.

"That was a bit hard, but in the end, I received a Special Education HSC equivalent."

A keen musician before the accident, Jess lost her ability to play cello because it involves reading music, but she managed to restart playing drums and began performing around the region; she also worked at a preschool and with Care for Kids.

Then two years ago, Jess became a mum to Joey with her partner Ben Abbott.

" I just always wanted to be a mum, and I am so happy and love Joey so much," she said.

"He also has a big brother and sister from Ben's previous relationship, and they love him as well."

Jess, now 30, thoroughly enjoys motherhood but says she does find it tiring.

"My memory is impacted, and reading and writing is still a challenge, but I've got my full driver's license which is good," she said.

"I'll probably go back to a speech pathologist to develop my confidence and improve my comprehension and memory when Joey is a bit older. I enjoy reading books to him, and if I find filling out forms or organizing things difficult, I get Ben to help.

"Sometimes, I think I should be better than I am. But then I tell myself, that's who I am, and that's okay.

"It took me a long time to get here, but I'm happy in my life."

Jess isn't sure what she'll be doing this Mother's Day, but she'll make sure it involves showing her love and appreciation to her mum and grandmas, and spending time with her family.

Our journalists work hard to provide local, up-to-date news to the community. This is how you can continue to access our trusted content: